A Girl Like You Get Away Try Again Lyrics

Beloved songs are where nosotros go our passion, our soul — and most of our worst ideas.

Nothing skillful tin come up of this. Photo by Achim Voss/Flickr.

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Throughout human history, oceans have been crossed, mountains take been scaled, and keen families have blossomed — all considering of a few simple chords and a melody that inflamed a heart and propelled information technology on a noble, romantic mission.

On the other manus, that time you lot told that daughter you lot merely started seeing that you would "catch a grenade" for her? You did that because of a love song. And information technology wasn't exactly a coincidence that she suddenly decided to "lose your number" and move back to Milwaukee to "figure some stuff out."

"It's just, my mom. Y'all know? And Fifty.A. is so hot in the summer. And yeah, my mom." Photo via iStock.

That fourth dimension yous held that boom box over your head outside your ex'southward house? You did that considering of a beloved vocal. And 50 hours of customs service after, y'all're still not back together.

Love songs are great. They make our hearts beat faster. They inspire united states of america to take risks and put our feelings on the line. And they give us terrible, terrible ideas about how bodily, real-life human relationships should work.

They're amazing. Then amazing. And also terrible.

Here are 6 love songs that audio romantic only aren't, and ane vocal that doesn't audio romantic but totally is:

i. "God Only Knows," by The Beach Boys

You can go along your "Surfin' Safaris," your "I Get Arounds," and your "Help me Rhondas."

When it comes to The Beach Boys, "God Simply Knows" is where it's at. A lush garden of soft horns and informal melody. A necktie-dye swirl of sound. A mural of haunted innocence with some of the most heartrending lyrics ever committed to the back of a surfboard.

Youth! Youth! Youth! Photo by Hulton Annal/Getty Images.

Here'due south why it sounds romantic:

I may not ever love you

Merely long as there are stars in a higher place you

Y'all never need to incertitude information technology

I'll make you so certain about it

God simply knows what I'd be without yous

If you're traipsing through a meadow in a sundress with your beloved and not playing "God Only Knows" on your iPod, you should really stop and start over.

If you lot're lazily bumping a beach ball over a volleyball net and "God Only Knows" isn't playing somewhere in the back of your heed, you need to rethink the choices that got you to this point.

If yous're a video editor compiling footage of grainy hippies frolicking in the mud and you're not underscoring it with the opening chords of "God But Knows," you are doing it wrong.

Hippies, likely on their way to a mud frolic. Photograph by Colin Davey/Getty Images.

It'due south a song that just feels like love. Pure love. Young love. Love with a chill, kelp-y vibe.

What could exist wrong with that?

Here'due south why it'south actually really, really unromantic:

There's nothing incorrect with loving someone. Sending them flowers. Leaving over-the-superlative notes in their P.O. boxes. Stroking their pilus as they autumn asleep while you whisper the consummate works of Nicholas Sparks into their ear.

"Miles Ryan stood on the back porch of his house, smoking a cigarette..." Photo past hatchettebookgroup.biz.

But in that location is such a matter as loving someone a skosh too much.

If you should always leave me

Though life would still continue believe me

The earth could show zero to me

So what good would living do me?

Look, I go it. Breakups suck. There'southward no getting around that. Just adept God.

At that place'due south a huge difference betwixt saying: "Hey infant, you are my first and foremost everything and I'll be bummed if you go." And saying: "Welp, yous accepted that job in Seattle, so I'k just gonna chug a agglomeration of nightshade and call it a life."

But that's pretty much the gist hither. Which makes this line...

God only knows what I'd be without yous

...horror-flick creepy. Because the reply, apparently, is: "I'd be a corpse!"

Ah well. We had a good run. Photo via iStock.

That'south not love. That's codependency (to put it mildly). Oh, and hey! Threatening to impale yourself if your partner leaves isn't loving. It's a form of emotional corruption.

Investing all your happiness and sense of cocky-worth in any human relationship — 1 that, by definition, might 1 24-hour interval finish — is putting a lot of eggs in one basket. Sure, God may simply know what you'd be without her, but God probably also hopes you take, I don't know, some hobbies. Accept a yoga class. Google some woodworking videos. Try kite surfing.

"Yeah! Hell yeah! What was her name once more?" Photo past Jim Semlor/Federal Highway Administration.

Ane person cannot be anyone'due south exist-all and end-all. It'due south too stressful. And it prevents you from doing you, which is a thing that'due south gotta be done earlier you can do anything else.

No wonder she took that job in Seattle.

ii. "Treasure," by Bruno Mars

Sure, it's a blatant rip off of every Michael Jackson song you've ever heard. But, we don't have Michael Jackson anymore, and as tribute acts go, you could do a lot worse than Bruno Mars.

Await at that confront. That face! Photo by Brothers Le/Flickr.

Here's why the song sounds romantic:

Treasure, that is what you are

Honey, you're my gilded star

You know yous tin can make my wish come true

If you allow me treasure you

If yous let me treasure y'all

Laissez passer those lyrics to anyone on a used napkin at an 8th-grade make-out party and you'll likely go an instant toll pass on the highway to tongue-boondocks (ew).

Laissez passer them to your spouse and, chances are, appointment nighttime is going to culminate in 47 minutes of chaste-even so-passionate frenching.

Laissez passer them to a cop who pulls y'all over for running a end sign, and they will think you lot're weird — simply probably still make out with y'all.

In fact, Bruno Mars basically has a lifetime pass to make out with America considering of this vocal.

This is what happens when you write "Treasure" and you're on phase with Michelle Obama. Photo past Mandel Ngan/Getty Images.

And I'one thousand OK with that.

Simply, here'southward why "Treasure" isn't as romantic as it seems:

Everything about "Treasure" is retro. Everything.

Including its attitudes nearly gender.

"Children, take I e'er told y'all what I shouted at your mother on the street the starting time time nosotros met?" Photo by Jacobsen/Getty Images.

Things get-go to become south right from the very kickoff:

Give me your, give me your, requite me your attention, baby

I gotta tell you a little something about yourself

Ah yeah. Cipher screams "respect" quite similar a man lecturing a foreign adult female on the street about something she "doesn't know almost herself."

What could it be? Could it be that her jokes are funny? Could information technology be that she's got something in her teeth? Could information technology be that her nonfiction book almost early mod German history is extremely detailed and informative?

"Thank you for teaching me all about Martin Luther's bible!" Photograph past Torsten Schleese/Wikimedia Commons.

Spoiler Warning: It's none of those.

You're wonderful, flawless, ooh, you're a sexy lady

Just you walk around hither similar y'all wanna be someone else

Oh. It's that she's sexy. Cool, bro. Very original.

Word of communication? Regardless of how she'south walking, the lady knows she'due south sexy. Fifty-fifty if she doesn't, it really doesn't affect her day-to-day then much that you, a complete stranger, need to shout information technology at her (even over a funky disco snare).

And then what if she does want to be someone else? I'd dearest to be someone else! I think being Ryan Gosling would be quite dainty. A practiced way to spend a three-24-hour interval weekend.

Sure, at that place'd be an adjustment period... Photo by Eamonn Thou. McCormack/Getty Images.

And then later, of grade, the narrator can't help himself:

Pretty girl, pretty daughter, pretty girl, you should be smiling

A girl similar you should never expect and then blue.

He respects her so much, he's actually straight-upwardly telling her to grin! Much like Mars' character "Uptown Funk," who appears to get off on angrily exhorting girls to "hit [their] hallelujah." Which, you know, I judge everybody's got a thing.

Yes, in the world of "Treasure," a healthy relationship is an unending stream of a man complimenting a strange woman and said adult female being and so totally flattered that she immediately dispenses "the sexual practice."

He then proceeds to talk to his potential lover like the earth's creepiest pirate:

You are my treasure, yous are my treasure

Yous are my treasure, yep, you, you lot, y'all, you are

You are my treasure, you are my treasure

Yous are my treasure, yeah, you, you, you, you are

Past this signal, in his listen, she's a literal affair. An object. Which is fitting.

I suppose information technology could be worse, though. At to the lowest degree she'southward not just whatever matter.

GIF from "The Two Towers."

That'due south ... something, right?

three. "Don't Think Twice, Information technology's All Correct," by Bob Dylan

For as long as humans take been dating each other, humans have been breaking up with each other. And "Don't Recall Twice" is a portrait of a relationship going downwardly in flames. Glorious, poetic, acoustic flames.

Bob Dylan, a guy who is good at writing songs that a lot of people like. Photograph by William Lovelace/Getty Images.

Here's why information technology sounds romantic:

Well, information technology ain't no use to sit and wonder why, babe

Even you don't know by now

And it own't no use to sit and wonder why, babe

It'll never practise somehow

When your rooster crows at the pause of dawn

Expect out your window, and I'll be gone

You're the reason I'm a-traveling on

But don't retrieve twice, it's all right.

Nail. Strummed on out of that friends-with-benefits state of affairs like whoa.

"Don't Think Twice" is a raw song. An honest song. A powerful song. It's the song your older sis played on continuous loop for half dozen months afterward her young man left for college. The song that convinced your Aunt Roslyn to leave her banking concern-teller task, load her four Australian shepherds into the van, and open up a wind chime store in Mendocino. The vocal your friend's cool dad ever wants to play when he invited your high schoolhouse band over to his apartment to jam.

"What timbre are yous looking for?" Photograph by Sharon Ang/Pixabay.

Certain, it'south most the terminate of a relationship, just it sounds romantic. And at the end of the twenty-four hours, shouldn't that be enough?

Here's why it's actually sooooo messed up:

Relationships finish. For a lot of reasons. And while there is no correct fashion to call information technology quits with someone, when the grit settles, both parties tin can certainly do good from a difficult, honest discussion about what went wrong.

It'southward non me, Joan. It's you. 100% you lot. Photo by Rowland Scherman/Getty Images.

In "Don't Think Twice," that discussion basically boils down to: "Information technology's your fault."

Let's review the reasons the dude in "Don't Think Twice" is splitting with his lady friend:

I gave her my heart, but she wanted my soul

Ugh, women, right? You're all similar, "Babe, I just have and then much unspecified dearest to give," and she's like, "Take out the trash!" And y'all're like, "Only baaaaaaabe, shouldn't my heart be plenty?" And she's like, "No, seriously. I already did the laundry, cleaned the whole business firm, fed the dog, did the dishes, and made both of our lunches for the calendar week. All I need you lot to do is take out the trash." And you're like, "Yous're bumming me out. I'm gonna go play guitar." And so she gets all mad! What did yous practise? Why is she trying to change yous? UGH!

You could have done better, simply I don't mind

Yes. You lot do heed! You mind! You wrote a vocal nearly it, you passive-aggressive prick.

You but kinda wasted my precious time

Ah yes. Your time is so precious! Recollect nearly all the hours you wasted plumbing the ocean-deep, ecstatic mysteries of homo partnership when you lot could have been futzing effectually with that domicile-brew kit.

Yep, this was worth information technology. Photo by Beak Bradford/Flickr.

The infinitesimal you kickoff breaking it down, the bulletin of "Don't Call back Twice" of a sudden starts to seem a lot less romantic. Similar your sister's ex-young man, who worked at the Bass Pro Store in town for a while and now might be in jail. Like your aunt's wind chinkle store, which would take closed forever agone had she not received that inheritance from her mom in the '80s. Like your friend's cool dad, who wasn't exactly, technically, paying child support.

"You kids want a beer? No ane'southward under 13, right?" Photo via iStock.

Oh aye, and the vocal's narrator also point-blank refers woman he's leaving equally:

A kid, I'm told

That's right. In addition to being a run-of-the-mill passive-aggressive jerk — turns out, he's likewise possibly a pedophile.

Even if we are to accept that this is a metaphor and she's not actually a child — which there's no indication it is, but OK, Bob Dylan — the fact that Commitmentphobe Gunderson here would willingly choose an young partner reflects way more poorly on him than it does on her.

Breaking up with anyone in such a brutal, dismissive way is a recipe for sticking them with years of therapy bills.

Which, I suppose, may be the point.

4. "Leaving on a Jet Plane," past John Denver

Who has 2 thumbs and wrote a bittersweet folk vocal about hurtling through the stratosphere in a giant aluminum tube at 600 miles per hour?

This guy. Photograph past Hughes Television Network/Wikimedia Commons.

Here's why information technology sounds romantic:

"Leaving on a Jet Airplane" is a lovely song. And impressive in its loveliness considering jet planes were all the same kind of new at the time it was written.

'Cause I'm leavin' on a jet plane

To a mod ear, this would be sort of like singing, "I'1000 a scoooting abroad on my hoverboooooard," but in a style that's somehow still folksy and heartbreaking and singable by 9-year-olds at summer army camp. Not piece of cake to do!

Oh infant, I hate to go

You see — he hates to go! He just hates information technology! Nosotros know this, considering he tells us he hates information technology. And why would he hate to become if he didn't dearest his partner just that much?

Come across ya! Photograph by Altair78/Wikimedia Commons.

Why indeed?

Here's why information technology'south actually not that romantic at all:

All the plaintive guitar, loping bass line, and twangy, melancholy warbling in the world can only distract so much from the fact that the song'south main character is well, kind of a jerkweed.

And in reality — surprise surprise! — it doesn't actually seem similar he hates existence away all that much:

There'south so many times I've let yous down

So many times I've played around

I tell you lot at present, they don't hateful a matter

"Infant, I promise! All the movies I watched alone while yous were habitation nursing the quadruplets. All the times I drained our life savings on Zoo Zillionaire. All the random sex I had with other women. Totally meaningless. Certainly fun to do! Really fun. Similar, I had a fantastic time. But rest assured — completely empty, in an ontological sense."

"As empty as this bed I merely finished having sex activity with someone else in." Photograph via iStock.

Aye, when you break it down, "Leaving on a Jet Airplane," is less of a passionate tribute to beloved overcoming distance and more the deluded ramblings of a guy who needs to convince himself he's "good" despite all evidence to the contrary.

And for all he claims to exist broken up most having to part from his one and only, the dude seems pretty excited about the flight. Oh, you're leaving on a jet airplane, are y'all? Are yous Zone 1? Gonna humblebrag on Twitter about the "terrible" Cibo express salad you were forced to choke down equally you saturday waiting to commence on your fun, mysterious adventure?

"Life and then difficult @ LGA #missingmybabe." Photo by Gesalbte/Wikimedia Eatables.

He continues:

Ev'ry place I become, I'll think of you lot

Ev'ry song I sing, I'll sing for you

Ah absurd. He'll remember most her while strumming and making "my love is fragile as the morning time dew" eyes at a waif-y grad student in the front row. That pretty much makes up for it all.

Then he demands:

And then kiss me and grin for me

Tell me that you'll wait for me

After all the betrayal and heartbreak, after basically revealing himself to be a grade-A sleaze who can't exist trusted, he however has the gall to tell her to await? To expect for him?

And here's the kicker:

When I come back, I'll bring your wedding ceremony ring

Ah yes. He'll put a ring on it. Finally.

"Ehhhhhhh...." Photo via iStock.

Unlike all the previous trips, where he's cheated a billion times, tuckered the family depository financial institution account, and but been a general screwup and disappointment.

But aye. This time he says he'll bring dorsum a hymeneals ring.

I hope she joins a polyamorous octad and never looks back.

5. "When a Man Loves a Adult female," Percy Sledge

When you look upwardly "soul" in the dictionary, the book plays you a recording of this song.

Percy Sledge, having a few thoughts. Photo by Gene Pugh/Flickr.

Specifically, it plays you the very beginning line.

Hither'due south why it sound very romantic:

When a man loves a woman

Certain, y'all can write the lyrics downwardly, merely it doesn't even come up close to capturing the heartache. The yearning. The succulent, delicious pain-belting:

WHEN A Man LOVES A WOMAN

Closer ... but all the same no.

WHEN A MAAAAAAAN. LOVES A WOOOMAN!

Aye! Sing it, Percy Sledge!

It's an elemental lyric.

It's a heart-shattering lyric.

It'south a lyric that demands you put your dorsum into it.

It's perfection.

Equally long as you lot don't keep listening.

Hither's why the song is actually pretty horrifying:

From the opening lines of "When a Man Loves a Woman," nosotros know that, at to the lowest degree on occasion, a man loves a woman.

Which raises the question: What happens when said man loves said adult female?

He'd give up all his comforts

And slumber out in the rain

If she said that's the manner

It ought to exist.

Whoa! OK. No. Back up. A man, no matter how devoted, no thing how selfless, no matter how in love, needs shelter. Otherwise, a man will die of exposure and hypothermia.

Turn his dorsum on his best friend if he put her downward.

No! Jeez. No. A human tin't put up with that kind of isolating beliefs. A homo needs friends! Once a man's whole support system erodes out from nether him, a man volition be bitter, ungrounded, and alone. And a homo's mental wellness will deteriorate.

I gave you everything I have

Tryin' to hold on to your heartless love

Baby, please don't care for me bad.

This is not what happens "when a human loves a woman." It'south what happens when a man loves a decision-making, manipulative woman. An calumniating woman. A woman who, in truth, only loves a woman. Herself.

"It'southward Chris or me." Photo past geralt/Pixabay.

And that'southward non salubrious.

Run, Percy Sledge, run! We're here for you.

(Side annotation: Lest it go implied, there is way more than than one manner for a human being to love a adult female. Maybe they spend every waking moment cuddling and bopping each other on the nose. Maybe they sleep in split bedrooms. Peradventure they apparel upwardly in big, costly true cat costumes and refer to each other Mr. and Mrs. Kittyhawk. And when a human being loves a man, I imagine information technology feels much the same. Or when a woman loves a woman. Or when a gender nonconforming person loves a gender nonconforming person.)

Regardless of the depth of commitment, living situation, or combination of genders or sexual orientations, there's no 1-size-fits-all dearest solution. Every relationship is a unique snowflake. Multifariousness is the spice of life. Necessity is the mother of invention. There's more ane manner to peel a cat. A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go downward.

It doesn't matter if it's the right metaphor, as long as it's a metaphor. Photo by Rosmarie Voegtli/Flickr.

Point being: Generalize at your peril, Sledge. And please, seek help! You tin can practice this! And if you ever discover yourself in a like situation, please give these people a phone call.

half dozen. "All I Wanna Do is Make Love to You," Eye

Honestly, Heart could sing a list of the most pop AllRecipes ("Jaaaamie'due south Cranberry Spinach Saaaaalad/Earth's Best Lasaaaaagna/Sour Creeeeeam Cutouts") and it would brand me want to bawl my eyes out in the arms of a alpine, night stranger at the end of a pier.

This vocal is perfect. You lot should ever exist listening to it. If y'all're not listening to information technology now, smack yourself in the face up and Google it. Information technology's just that important.

I am singing the phone book. You are weeping similar a tiny baby. Photograph by FatCat125/Wikimedia Commons.

And so much passion. So much pain. So much hair.

Here'south why it sounds romantic:

Over pounding drums and a soaring melody, Heart sisters Nancy and Ann Wilson deliver a key tribute to the 1 true romantic fantasy shared past every living existence on Earth: picking up an unnervingly attractive human for one night of listen-blowing sexual activity and then releasing him dorsum into the wild to os — but never quite as compellingly always again.

They sing:

It was a rainy dark when he came into sight

Standing by the road, no umbrella, no coat

And then I pulled up aslope and I offered him a ride

He accepted with a grinning so nosotros collection for a while

I don't take to continue considering you know what happens side by side, and it'due south awesome.

"I just sit down in this cabin. Counting the days since. Counting ... the ... days." Photo by Rene Asmussen/Pexels.

Now, hither's why this vocal is not romantic at all:

The relationship in "All I Wanna Practise" seems likewise good to be true. And it is. Because it'southward not an equally loving ,or fifty-fifty equally brawny, pairing at all.

It's a...

It's a...

Well. You know what information technology is:

Skilful at recognizing no-win situations and delicious with lemon?! Photograph by Pikawil/Flickr.

For a while, things are bustling along just fine, like whatsoever wholesome, illicit, anonymous affair should:

I didn't ask him his name, this alone male child in the rain

Fate, tell me it's right, is this love at first sight?

Sure, many of united states might hesitate to pick up a strange leather-jacket-clad homo continuing on the side of the road for a no-strings-attached screw, but our narrator but has a feeling about this guy, and sometimes, you gotta become with your gut.

I can respect that.

We fabricated magic that nighttime

He did everything right

Cracking! Seems like information technology was a good decision. Bonking the hitchhiker is payin' off big time.

Just so, without alarm, the vocal starts to sound less like an all-time great romance and more than similar a story men's rights activists tell each other as they vape around a campfire:

I told him "I am the bloom, you are the seed

We walked in the garden, we planted a tree

Don't try to notice me, please don't you dare

Just alive in my memory, you'll always exist there"

I'k not a poet. Symbolic language ofttimes eludes me. But unless "flower," "seed," "garden," and "tree," suddenly hateful wildly different things in the context of human reproduction than they take since sexual practice was first invented in the early-1970s, we're talking about a surprise, not-mutually-consensual pregnancy!

HELLO! Photograph by Avsar Aras/Wikimedia Commons.

Of course, metaphors are opaque, interpretations vary, etc., etc., etc. Y'all might be tempted to think, "Maybe Heart meant something else by that."

To that I say, no, they definitely meant it:

And so information technology happened one day

We came round the aforementioned fashion

Yous can imagine his surprise

When he saw his own optics

There are two possibilities here.

1: The narrator of the song is recently-deceased Jerry Orbach from this creepy New York City subway advertizement from ix years agone:

Photo past eyedonation.org.

Or two: She totally bamboozled a dude into whipping up a baby on the sly.

I said, "Please, delight understand

Ah, sure. Aye. No worries.

I'm in beloved with another human being

Cool, so this all makes sense and is in no way the nightmarish scheme of a deranged sociopath who has now wrecked not one but ii lives.

And what he couldn't requite me, oh, no

Was the one little affair that you can"

A Homo LIFE! A Real SENTIENT Human LIFE THAT IS Non INCIDENTAL TO ALL OF THIS!

The best you can say about that is that it's not technically illegal, and that leather-jacket man probably should have been responsible for his own birth control. Or, at the very to the lowest degree, asked more questions .

Simply ... it's not cute. It's not romantic (even the Wilson sisters themselves hold).

And at the end of the day, the shadiest grapheme in this song is somehow not the rain-soaked hitchhiker wandering to nowhere in the night.

Which... is maxim something.

But there is a honey song that is truly, madly, deeply perfect. An unassailable runway in a sea of problematic faves.

A song that does everything right.

A song that paints a portrait of a salubrious partnership built to terminal.

A song that can double equally a manual for the platonic human romantic relationship.

And that song is...

"Processed Store," past fifty Cent, featuring Olivia

Here's why you lot might be — OK, well-nigh definitely are — skeptical:

50 Cent (L) and that guy. You lot know, that guy? That guy! Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images.

Equally catchy as "Candy Store" is, as fun it is to dance to, and equally cathartic as it tin can be to scream in the centre of a crowded fraternity house at 2 a.one thousand., there'southward no getting around the fact that the vocal begins like this:

I'll take you to the processed shop

I'll let you lick the lollipop

I'll mail service that once again, in case yous missed some of the nuance:

I'll take you to the processed shop

I'll permit you lick the lollipop

Manner to take one for the team, narrator of "Candy Store"!

At first glance, "Processed Shop" is nobody's idea of a classic love song.

The lyrics are ... unusually forward. The vanquish is kinda basic. The hook is like the music they play when Abu Nazir sidles scarily by in "Homeland."

OooooOOOOoooooOOOo. GIF from "Homeland."

It doesn't get played much anymore. When it does resurface, it feels ... kinda dated. Like watching that DVD of "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" on your new Xbox 360.

It's not a song you'd put on a mixtape for your crush. It's not a song you lot'd play for your spouse when the kids are at habitation with the babysitter and you've got nine hours to tear up the Piscataway Hampton Inn. Information technology's certainly not a song you'd include on the video photograph montage you fabricated for your grandparents' silverish anniversary.

It's merely not.

Simply it should be.

And then here it is. Here'due south why "Candy Store" by 50 Cent, featuring Olivia, is actually the perfect relationship song:

You wanna back that thing upwards or should I push button up on it? Photo past ionasnicolae/Pixabay.

The bass drum hits. The MIDI violins whine. The vocalizer starts filling out his fellatio permission slip. It's only been xx seconds, and you're already getting fix to hang it up with "Processed Shop."

But and so ... over the square thrum and the mewling strings, a miracle occurs — in the course of a female person voice joining the track, cutting through the din similar a clarion call.

She sings:

I'll accept you to the candy shop (aye)

Boy, one sense of taste of what I got (uh-huh)

I'll accept you spendin' all you got (come on)

Keep going 'til you hit the spot, whoa

It's mutual! It'due south common! They're performing oral sexual activity on each other!

Ring the bells! Bang the drums! Release the doves!

Go, cunnilingus doves, go! Photo past liz west/Flickr.

50 Cent himself may non be the world'due south greatest partner — for example, according to one of his exes, he's done some pretty unforgivable things.

Simply the narrator of "Candy Shop"? He gets information technology:

You could have it your style, how exercise yous desire it?

Rather than merely imposing his desires on the person he's with — a la the dude in "God But Knows ("I'm going to invest my entire sense of self-worth in you!") or the street heckler in "Treasure" ("I'm going to treat y'all similar a chest total of gold doubloons!") or the sociopath in "All I Wanna Do is Make Love to Yous," ("I'one thousand going to play a trick on yous into knocking me up!") — the "Processed Store" guy actually asks his partner what she wants.

Which, in the world of popular music, is practiced for about 50,000 trillion points.

And where are they going to practice it? The hotel? Back of the rental? The beach? The park?

It's any you're into

'Cause consent is sexy!

I ain't finished pedagogy you 'tour how sprung I got ya

The narrator of "Candy Shop" is certainly ... believing near his desires.

But hither'due south the central matter: the lady on the receiving end of those desires? She's clearly into it. And we know this because she says and so.

The lines of consent in "Candy Shop" are bright cherry-red, highlighted, and soldered into the weirdly sticky club flooring.

Meanwhile, Robin Thicke is outside trying to convince the bouncer that his uncle is a lawyer. Photo past Grim23/Wikimedia Eatables.

Girl what we practice ...

And where nosotros do ...

The things we do ...

Are just betwixt me and yous

No affair how nasty they freak, it will be intimate. Information technology will be private. There will exist no revenge porn (the epilogue to "Blurred Lines," to wit, would definitely exist a protracted, emotionally devastating lawsuit).

If y'all exist a nympho, I'll be a nympho

Sexual compatibility is key to the survival of any relationship, whether years, weeks, or (very possibly in the case of "Candy Shop") minutes long.

She may have a high sex drive, just dude is graciously offer to accommodate her. What a gentleman! These crazy kids only might go the distance after all.

And at the end of the day, what is a relationship but ii nymphos, sharing wellness insurance?

Cheers, Obamacare! Photo by Wonderlane/Flickr.

Information technology's like it'south a race who could go undressed quicker

Over again, everybody is having a dandy time. And, critically, an equally swell time.

I touch on the right spot at the correct time

Of course, it wouldn't be a pop/hip-hop striking without a spot of random braggadocio, but if we're to take him at his word, "Processed Shop" guy is at least every bit expert at "doing everything right" equally the anonymous hitchhiker from "All I Wanna Do is Make Honey to Y'all" — except without all the creepy surprise baby nonsense.

The "Processed Shop" guy is a keeper. Because he'due south not a hero or a stranger in the night or a funky, shimmering beloved god. He'due south a good partner.

"Candy Store" is raunchy. Information technology's dirty. It'southward non your grandmother's love vocal.

Merely when you strip away the swagger, the dorsum beat, and the weird strings from "Best of Public Domain Centre Eastern Music 1993," past the end of the song, both people are satisfied. And at the end of the day, isn't that what a healthy human relationship is all about?

Yeah.

Uh-huh.

Photograph by Francois Durand/Getty Images.

So seductive.

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Source: https://www.upworthy.com/6-songs-that-seem-romantic-but-arent-and-one-that-seems-like-it-isnt-but-is

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